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When Sex is Painful: Dr. Michael Sytsma

September 2, 2025

Sex can be painful in so many ways—but it doesn’t have to mean doom. Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers way to transform hurt to eventual healing.

Featured Offer

Weekend to Remember

A getaway with a goal: oneness. No marriage is static. Each day, each choice — you’re either moving closer together, toward oneness … or coasting farther apart. At the intersection of a faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life, Weekend to Remember helps couples do just that — choose oneness. Whether you’re sending up an SOS for marital rescue or looking to foster an already flourishing connection, Weekend to Remember is your best next step toward being, and staying, one.

Past Episodes

Initiating or declining married sex: It’s tricky. Are your signals clear? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you with “not tonight” and “yes, please.”
August 5, 2025
Wondering how to keep your married sex life sizzling—or just move around conflict or hurt? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you troubleshoot.
July 1, 2025
Is marriage worth it? If you've never wondered yourself, you may have had someone ask you that question. In this special teaser episode to Season 4 of Married with Benefits, hosts Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins are joined by Dr. Brad Wilcox, a renowned sociologist specializing in marriage and family research. Dr. Wilcox is a Professor of Sociology and Director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, as well as the Future of Freedom Fellow at the Institute for Family Studies.Join us for this conversation exploring why more and more people are doubting marriage's value and what the research actually says. You'll also learn data-backed practical advice for building a happy marriage and family -- for yourself or for a friend!
June 3, 2025
Does one of you want more sex than the other? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas and insight to work through differences in sexual desire.
May 6, 2025
Your sex drive brings expectation, connection, rejection, confusion. But understanding it changes everything! Sex therapist Michael Sytsma weighs in.
April 1, 2025
When it comes to sex…what’s normal? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma & Shaunti Feldhahn discuss research about drive, initiative, and other questions.
March 4, 2025
Who do highly happy couples attribute their happiness to? Themselves or their partners? Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn and learn the power of humility and expressing gratitude for your better half.
September 5, 2024
True or False? One of the best ways to resolve conflict in marriage is to let go of it. Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn as they discuss the art of "conflict amnesia."
August 29, 2024
Divorce and Christians: there are some misunderstandings around its prevalence. Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn as they set the record straight and learn how keeping God at the center does help to make highly happy couples.
August 22, 2024
Can you keep an eye on the exit and have a happy marriage? Some couples keep separate bank accounts just in case. But in this episode, Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn explore how vulnerability in relationships—being "all in" with your spouse—leads to greater trust and happiness.
August 15, 2024

About Married With Benefits by FamilyLife

We got married because we thought we’d be better together rather than apart. So why is it so easy to feel isolated from your life-long partner?

Host, author, and fellow married pilgrim, Brian Goins, tackles the relational pitfalls, from the trivial to the tragic, that move couples towards isolation rather than experiencing the real benefits that come from saying “I do.”

About Brian Goins

Brian Goins (Host):
Brian & Jen Goins live Melbourne, FL where Brian is the Senior Director of Strategic Projects and helps lead the Weekend to Remember team. He is also a producer of the documentary, “The Brain, The Heart, The World,” a series exploring the dangers of pornography. Jen enjoys leading Bible study groups and connecting with women through mentoring. The Goins have 3 kids: Brantley, Palmer, and Gibson. As a family they enjoy making annual treks to Montana to hike and ski and have loved attending Pine Cove family camp together.

Shaunti Feldhahn (Featured Host):
Shaunti received her graduate degree from Harvard University and was an analyst on Wall Street before unexpectedly becoming a social researcher, best-selling author and popular speaker. Today, she applies her analytical skills to investigating eye-opening, life-changing truths about relationships, both at home and in the workplace. Her groundbreaking research-based books, such as For Women Only, have sold more than 3 million copies in 25 languages and are widely read in homes, counseling centers and corporations worldwide.

Shaunti’s findings are regularly featured in media as diverse as The Today Show and Focus on the Family, The New York Times and Cosmo. She (often with her husband, Jeff) speaks at 50 events a year around the world. Shaunti and her husband Jeff live in Atlanta with their teenage daughter and son, and two cats who think they are dogs.

Contact Married With Benefits by FamilyLife with Brian Goins

Mailing Address
FamilyLife ®
100 Lake Hart Drive
Orlando FL 32832
 
Telephone Number
1-800-FL-TODAY
(1-800-358-6329)

Social Media
Twitter: @familylifetoday
Facebook: @familylifeministry
Instagram: @familylifeinsta