How Are You Doing? - From His Heart - Week of February 24, 2016

A few years ago, a lady came to see me for a counseling appointment.  She was very dissatisfied in her marriage and was about to call it quits.  As she talked about her husband and the awful man he was, the thought went through my head, Why on earth did you marry him? 
 
After she vented about her terrible husband, I began to ask about her job performance as a wife.  At first, she felt justified in being less than stellar, but then the light began to dawn.  I asked her this question, "When you stand before God to give an account of your life, what do you think He will say about how well you respected your husband?  She began to get quiet.  Obviously, she was not doing well in that important department. 
 
I referred her to 1 Peter 3:1-2.  She readily agreed to having a husband who was "disobedient to the word."  I told her that she could win him without a word of nagging or negativity.  All she had to do was start to show him respect.  The Bible says, "Let the wife see to it that she respect her husband" (Ephesians 5:33).  Respect is a man's deepest need.    
 
I told this hurting wife that offering him respect would not be easy.  It would require supernatural help from the Spirit of God.  But, if she would yield herself to the Holy Spirit, He would empower her to respect her husband and be the wife God wanted her to be. 
 
Well, she went away and did what I counseled her to do.  And you know what?  He noticed, and he responded to the respect.  Things began to improve in their home, and the icy bitterness began to melt away.  As she showed him respect, he began to show her more love and tenderness.  As she worked on her job description as a wife, he began to be won "without a word." 
 
HOW ABOUT YOU?
 
How about you and your life?  Are you willing to start doing what God says to do?  Are you willing to quit pointing fingers at others who are not doing right and start looking in the mirror at yourself?  God is never going to ask you how your spouse did, or your kids did, or your boss did.  He is going to ask you how you did with what He commanded you to do.  Paul said, "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad" (2 Corinthians 5:10).
 
Our day of reckoning before the Lord is fast approaching.  It will be the ultimate performance review.  Why not start taking inventory now?  Honestly evaluate yourself before the Lord.  Focus on the things He has called you to do.  In your marriage, stop asking God to change your spouse, and start asking Him to change you and enable you to be the spouse He wants you to be. 
 
God's word is true.  When we put it into practice, we see His miracles take place.  Try it and see.

P.S.  I would love to hear your thoughts on this.  Direct questions and comments to pastorjeff@fromhisheart.org.