FamilyLife Today®

Be My Pablo?
By Carlos Santiago

I met my best friend in fifth grade. We took the same classes in high school, went to the same college, worked for the same companies—even married sisters.

After my wife and I got married, my “Pablo time” was significantly reduced. Distance, responsibilities, and a genuine desire to spend every waking moment with my new bride meant I rarely saw my old friend.

One morning years later, when I attempted to leave for work, the car wouldn’t start. My automotive resume, at this point, contained only two lines:

• Expert gas pumper
• Proficient windshield-wiper fluid filler

I had no clue what to do next. I needed Pablo, but he was 70 miles away and on his way to work.

When my wife came in, she found me leaning under the open hood. I stood there for a moment, considering my options.

Then I asked her, “Could you be my Pablo?”

She turned around and left the garage. When she returned a few minutes later, her clothes told me she was ready to get her hands dirty.

My wife understood what I was asking. I needed her to be more than my wife—more than someone I did fun things with. I was asking her to work beside me to fix this problem.

But more than that, I was asking her to be my new best friend.

Over the years, we’ve not only diagnosed and repaired the car multiple times, but we’ve gutted and remodeled our kitchen, run cables, paved a walkway, built a deck, and tackled hundreds of little projects together.

I still enjoy working with Pablo, and marriage will never replace my outside friendships. But nothing compares to working with my wife.

Read on for a few secrets to matrimonial friendship.

The Good Stuff: This is my beloved and this is my friend. (Song of Solomon 5:16)

Action Points: What is one way you can encourage the friendship side of your marriage? Maybe there’s an interest you share with your friends that you can include your spouse in. Or consider something your spouse enjoys and plan some time to do it together.

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