Fan the Flames of Romance by Paying Attention
By Rick Warren
“Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” James 1:19 (NIV)
Good marriages don’t just happen. Marriages are what you make them. If you put in the effort, you can learn the skills and wisdom to build a great relationship, regardless of what your marriage has been like up until now.
During the next few days, we’re going to look at some practical ways you and your spouse can grow closer to each other and closer to God. Many of these principles can also be applied to any close relationship, at any stage of your life.
One skill that anyone can learn to help make their relationships better—whether in marriage or in friendship—is how to pay attention.
When you give someone your attention and focus, it’s like you give them a piece of your life.
Your time is your life because you’ll never get it back. That’s why the most loving act you can show your spouse is to pay attention to them. Those focused moments of intimate sharing are one of the most important ways you say, “I love you.”
The truth is, you fell in love by paying attention. You started paying attention to someone, and that person started paying attention to you. You probably bought flowers, wrote notes, and talked for hours on the phone. You spent your free time together.
But gradually your attention shifted. Today you may be more focused on paying bills, taking care of kids, pursuing hobbies, or building your career. Your spouse might not be the center of your attention anymore. A shift of focus happens naturally, but if you don’t bring your attention back to each other, your marriage will eventually crumble.
One of the ways you let your attention fade in marriage is when you stop listening to each other. Pride makes you assume you know what your spouse has said—because you think you’ve heard them say it over and over again through the years.
If you’ve stopped listening to your spouse, start listening again today. Why? First, you love the person. And when you give your attention by listening, you’re showing love. Next, sometimes God speaks through your spouse. Your spouse may have better insight into a situation than you do, and your spouse knows your blind spots and can help you see them.
God gives a great recipe in his Word for the kind of focused attention through listening that makes a marriage grow. James 1:19 says, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (NIV). When you do the first two parts of that verse, the third one will be automatic. As you do this, you’ll keep your marriage growing and going.
To fan the flames of romance in your marriage, start bringing back some of that focused attention. Show you care by staying aware. As you pay attention to each other, you’ll find yourselves growing closer even as you raise a family, pursue careers, and eventually grow old together.
PLAY today’s audio teaching from Pastor Rick
For more Daily Hope with Rick Warren, please visit pastorrick.com!
Be Encouraged Each Day to Live Out God’s Purposes
As thanks for your gift below to help share the gospel with more people around the world through Daily Hope, we’ll send you Pastor Rick’s new book, Daily Hope Devotional: 365 Days of Purpose, Peace, and Promise.
Each devotional starts out with a Bible verse, followed by teaching that explains God’s Word and shows you how to apply it daily so you can face any challenge and live the life you were created to live.
As a special bonus when you give, we’ll also send you What's Driving Your Life?: A 10-Day Turnaround for a Fresh Start. Featuring 10 hand-picked devotions from Pastor Rick’s new book, they’ll guide anyone feeling stressed, worried, or discouraged toward seeking God for a fresh start.
Request your copy below when you give—and take the first step towards a year of real purpose, lasting peace, and unfailing promises.
Thank you for your partnership!
*The USA IRS code permits you to deduct the amount of your financial gift to Daily Hope that exceeds the fair market value of materials you received from Daily Hope.
This devotional © 2018 by Rick Warren. All rights reserved. Used by permission.
You can listen to Rick Warren on OnePlace.com.
