Living on the Edge

Chip Ingram: Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We’ve all seen those advertisements about instant weight loss, getting in shape for five minutes a day. The problem is those quick fixes don’t last. So, what does it take to experience real lasting life change? I mean the kind of life change that helps you become the person you’ve always longed to be.

Today, I’m going to give you some specific steps from God’s word about how that really happens from the inside out. Stay with me.

Dave Druey: Hello and welcome to Living on the Edge. I’m your host, Dave Druey. If you’ve ever felt spiritually stuck, like you’re surviving the week instead of actually living, today’s message is for you. We’re at the start of a series called "Free at Last: How to Break Out of a Destructive Lifestyle." Today, Chip is going to walk us through how the process of transformation actually works and why the place God designed for it to happen might actually surprise you. Now here’s Chip Ingram with his Bible open to Ephesians chapter 4, starting in verse 4.

Chip Ingram: Green caterpillars are transformed in cocoons or pupa. Christians are transformed in community. The reason many Christians who genuinely have come to Christ, who have some initial outward changes and a few inward ones and then plateau and never deal with the deep, deep issues of the heart, is they are not in community where the real them shows up meeting real needs for the right reason in the right way. They are not in a place where they are vulnerable and someone loves the broken parts of them and loves them enough to encourage them and accept them, while at the same time holding them accountable and not letting them keep being the same person.

So he says, this is how transformation works. There's a reason, however, and the reason is really critical. He says there's one body, one spirit, just as you were called in one hope that you were called, one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father. Every time the word "one" is used here, underline that. There's seven of them.

Where it says "there is," put a box around "there is." Our English Bibles are absolutely fantastic, but just now and then, the Greek text is there in a way that's a little bit more in living color. The "there is" isn't in the original text, but it makes the sentence make sense because what Paul has done is used a very unusual grammatical device.

Basically, what he's saying is three chapters of all that God has done for you. Therefore, walk in a manner worthy. Let your life and lips tell the same story. Here's how to do it. Get together in deep authentic community and treat each other with humility and gentleness and patience and put up with stuff. The only way you'll do that is draw on his resources.

Then literally, he goes off. It's like you've got to understand how important this is. This is so important. It's not about your happiness. It doesn't work for you. It's not that it improves your life. He's going to do seven staccato "one, one, one, one," and then you'll notice there's four "alls." All, all, all, all.

There's a focus of unity. There's a focus of consistency. Then he does something where it's in triad. There's three "ones" followed by three "ones" followed by another three "ones." The Trinity is in this. Usually, we think of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, but he doesn't go that direction.

It's very unusual. He's talking about the church. He's talking about what Christ has done. He's talking to them and to us about this transformation. So he starts with how it works. The Spirit of God is what convicts us. The Spirit of God is what gives us spiritual birth. We're born of the Spirit. The Spirit of God is our pledge or down payment for heaven and our hope.

Notice what he does. I can imagine them opening the scroll and it's going bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, seven times. Basically what he goes: there's one body, the church, one Spirit who creates it, and one hope. You're the new church. The Spirit does it. He's taking you to heaven.

For what? Who's the focus? One Lord Jesus, one faith, one baptism. Jesus is the focus of it all. Each one of you have taken the step of faith, and each one of you have graphically, publicly told the world and said your past is behind you. What you did is you said, "My old life died and I've been resurrected with Him." All the privileges and all the persecution—think about when this was written.

This was written when there was a god on every corner. There's one Lord, one faith, one baptism. Then it goes to the Father. There's one God. But he's different than this god that makes everyone afraid. There's one God. He's the Father. He's kind. He's a dad. He's an Abba. He's the Father of all.

Notice he's sovereign. He's the creator. He's over all and through all and in all. Listen carefully. Here's what he's saying. This is what God's done for you, chapters one through three. Here's the command. Let Him live His life through you so that your behavior and your lifestyle match what's true.

The way to do that isn't about activity or do's and don'ts or external rules. It happens in community, in deep authentic relationships where you give to people what you really don't have to give, and so you draw in dependencies. You abide in Christ and you love others.

In fact, the way Jesus loves people, He gives you a moment with His Spirit. He speaks to you through His word. But the way Jesus is going to hug most of us is you're not going to get an angel from heaven at the foot of your bed tomorrow morning going, "Hey, need a hug?" He's going to hug you through me. He's going to hug me through you.

It's going to be the person in your small group. It's going to be the Jesus living in this body. He says as you do that, remember what Jesus said? The way the world will know that the Father has sent the Son is by the authenticity and the genuineness of our love for one another. Paul says that's what's at stake.

Dave Druey: You’re listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram, and we’ll continue the lesson in a moment. But while you’re with us, did you know that Chip’s teaching is also available on YouTube? The Living on the Edge channel has full video series, short-form clips, and a growing library of content you can watch anytime. Check out Chip’s other series like Sacred Strongholds, exploring the lies we believe that quietly destroy the lives we love. Just search "Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram" on YouTube and hit subscribe so you never miss what’s new. Now, here’s Chip.

Chip Ingram: I’m starting to feel like I’m old. I want you to know I’m not really old. I started very young, and Theresa started even younger. But I can tell you from when my kids were small and now with all these little grandkids, can you remember what it was like when you saw children learn to walk for the first time? Walking is moving out of your comfort zone and getting ready to fall, and then getting out of your comfort zone and ready to fall again. Then you do it again.

It's an off-balance, out of where you were from comfort to a moment of fearful indecision. Now with practice, it can be done eventually. But when your little kids fell down and they took two steps, what did you do? That was so good! Did you focus on their falling down or the few steps they took?

The Apostle Paul said walk in a manner worthy because he wants you to know that the Father in God rejoices at your steps of faith and he's not shocked when you fall down. What we really need to do is realize God is cheering for every step of faith and we need to be in that cocoon of community where we can be loved through that journey and process. But you have to learn. You have to learn how to appropriate grace. You have to learn how do you allow Christ to live His life through you.

The three reasons as you flip this text around and when you look at people's life experience, I want to give you some practical tools about what keeps us from metamorphosis. What are the barriers for all of us? As I go through this, don't get covered over with, "Oh, that's me. I'm a terrible person." No, God brought us here to say, "Let's go on a journey."

Let me give you these three things. I’ll give it sort of top level and we're going to be unpacking these. Three reasons we fail to be transformed. Reason number one is spiritual ignorance. Not stupidity. I'm not saying people are stupid. We just don't know. Our failure to understand our true identity in Christ destines us to the try-hard, do-good, fail syndrome. The problem is a lack of knowledge. The solution is discover your new identity.

I didn't know. I kind of grew up in a church that didn't preach the Bible. I became a new Christian and the Spirit came into my life and I got around a group of people that were really activity-oriented, which was good. So I tried hard, did good, failed. Tried hard, did good, failed. Tried hard, did not so good, and then I faked it. Then I quit trying.

I remember I was a Christian just about a year and a half or two years and I had this poster. It was in college. I had a poster and I had my Bible there and it was some poster about God so when people came in my room, "Hey, yo." I remember some things changed. Then it was playing basketball and baseball and I was an RA.

In my private moments, I realized lust had not changed, my ego really hadn't changed. I was now reading the Bible and I didn't want to be a hypocrite and I knew I was. All I knew was I was trying as hard as I could in my energy to be like Jesus because I thought that's what a Christian was.

I've got news for you. You can't do it. No one can live the Christian life but Jesus. The way the Christian life is lived is when we abide in relationship and the Spirit of God takes the word of God in the context of the cocoon of community and He produces the life of Christ. We have a part: make every effort.

So you have to discover your identity in Christ. I'll give you one verse to get you going and maybe a couple of resources. Galatians 2:20 is the Apostle Paul in one sentence saying if you don't understand the Christian life and you want to know the identity in Christ truth, here it is in one sentence. If you want the longer version, read Ephesians 1, 2, and 3. If you like a more technical version, read Romans 6, 7, and 8.

But let me just give it to you. This is the elevator pitch on your identity in Christ. Paul says, "I have been crucified with Christ. Nevertheless I live. Yet not I, but Christ lives within me. And this new life that I live, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me."

Paul realizes when he trusted Christ, he died with Christ. His old man died. He was resurrected with him. He's living out of who he already is. Yet he's saying I still live in this world, but yet not I, but it's Christ lives in me. The way you appropriate grace, the way you experience the truth of Ephesians 1, 2, and 3, it's a faith walk through grace. That's why the metaphor of walk is so important.

The second reason we fail to be transformed is spiritual isolation. Our failure to actively participate in deep, Christ-centered, honest relationships makes transformation impossible. The problem is pride. I don't mean necessarily just the pride where you stick out your chest. It's the pride of self-dependence.

If you don't have deep, authentic relationships, whether that's in a small group or whether that's around the table in your family or with a couple guys or a couple girls or two or three couples—I'm not talking about just being in a small group, that's the container—I'm talking about really doing life authentically and openly and lovingly and people who know what's really going on. You get accepted even when you blow it and you get kicked lovingly when you know you need a kick because they really care.

The reason we don't do that is my agenda is more important than God's agenda. When you tell me we don't have time, well, just all I have to do is say tell me what your schedule looks like. I work, work, work, and then we have youth sports and then I have this hobby and I work out and I go to the gym. Okay. So all you're telling me is that matters more than what God says is the very place where he's going to transform you. At the end of the day, everyone does what matters most, period. We never have a time problem. All of us have priority issues.

For some of you, here's the application. The solution is do life in community. For some, it's changing how life happens in your home. For others, you need to join a small group. Butterflies get transformed in cocoons; Christians get transformed in community. But there's a second application. It's not just join a group; it's get real in the group. If you can't do it with the whole group, maybe there's a couple people or even one or two you really get close to and you feel like, "You know what? I could really do life at a deeper level with this person."

I'm pretty comfortable sharing what's going on. I work with great people. My wife is very open and we can share things. But it was probably about three or four months ago as I was looking at the next year and this next season and see what God's doing at the church, I see what He's doing at Living on the Edge. I see these things bubbling up.

When God starts to prick you and you realize I need to address some things, who would I do that with? I have a friend that I've known for 30 years. We did ministry when I was 28 years old and we were partners together in a ministry together in a church of about 35 in Texas. We got to work for another 15 years later and he's now a pastor. We just tried to get on each other's schedule.

I remember realizing no one knows me on this entire planet better than him. I've got issues that could make or break what God wants to do in my life and through my life. In my self-dependence and over-scheduled arrogance, I'd not taken advantage of that. About three months ago, I asked if we could have breakfast and it took three weeks to even get breakfast on one morning. I asked, "Would you meet with me every other week?"

He said, "For what?" I said, "I need a place of someone who has all my history that I can be as honest with you as I am with Theresa. I know God wants to do some things to take me to a level and I don't know where to go. There's a lot of these people now who think I'm way smarter than I am. They think I'm more holy than I am, and you know the truth of all of that, right? It's been 30 years."

The only way I could do it is on a day that I really wanted to reserve for other things. Every other week we've been meeting. We got done this last week early in the morning. He turned to me as we were finishing up at Starbucks. He just looked at me, kind of his eyes wet, my eyes wet. He goes, "Man, I'm sure glad we're meeting again." I said, "Me too." Do you have that?

The third reason we fail to transform is spiritual myopia. That's a word for nearsighted. In other words, we fail to see the big picture. The problem is our culture of consumerism. The solution is to get a high holy view of God. The Christianity of the last 30 or 40 years that we've sent to the world is a consumeristic "God is my cosmic vending machine," "Jesus is my personal trainer, self-help guru."

The whole goal of the Christian life is: Am I happy? Am I fulfilled? Do I have a great marriage? Have I found the right person? Do my kids all turn out right? Are we upwardly mobile? Am I healthy, wealthy, and everything going my way? If not, Jesus, you're not coming through for me.

When did you forget that I, this narcissistic consumeristic Christian, have taken your word and made all of it about me? You're supposed to make me happy and healthy and wealthy and wise and wonderful and someday all my kids around the Thanksgiving table singing Kumbaya and everything turns out right. I never have a problem. Tragedy never happens. Cancer never happens. If I really believe, then everything goes my way.

We've been exporting that stuff around the world. If He gives you a rich deep marriage, if He gives you health, if He prospers your business, if your kids grow up and love God, all those are really wonderful byproducts. But I will tell you, Christians living like Christians are the acid test of whether God sent His Son.

There's one Spirit, one hope, one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father over all. How we live or don't live says to the world God is really God, Jesus is the savior. When we don't live like Christ, your happiness and my happiness and our fulfillment is very secondary. He's the creator. It's about Him. He has an agenda.

We sign up to say, "How can I serve you, oh Lord and master and creator, who is worthy of glory and honor and power? For you have created all things and by you all things have been created and in and by you they have their being." We are finite little people in this tiny thing called time. Time will go away and there'll be all eternity. We will worship a living God in a new heaven and a new earth.

What we do now matters for that and forever. He calls us to live those kind of lives. Like you, I'm inundated. If you thought, "Where did he get that rant and rave?" I've done that. We've had cancer in our house. I've had struggles with my kids. Things have gone wrong. I find myself starting to whine. But wait a second. The Bible says those are all the things that are going to help change me. I don't like them, but is God good or not? Is God sovereign or not? Is God in control or not? Is He the center or am I?

Dave Druey: This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram in a message called "Is a 'Changed Life' Really Possible?" part of our series, "Free at Last: How to Break Out of a Destructive Lifestyle." Now, if you’ve missed any part of this lesson, you can easily catch up online at livingontheedge.org. This series is also now streaming on the Living on the Edge podcast. Subscribe so every new episode comes to you automatically. And the Chip Ingram sermon podcast has each message in full, unedited, wherever you listen.

The key to authentic lasting change isn’t more effort or discipline. It’s knowledge of how to make that change happen the way God intended. That’s the kind of pivotal truth that Chip builds on throughout his book, "Yes! You Really Can Change." If you’ve been stuck in that try-hard-fail cycle, working at it and sliding back, this book is written for you. Right now, we’re including a second copy with every order so you can read it alongside a friend, a family member, or someone in your life who needs it. Just look for Chip’s book, "Yes! You Really Can Change," online at livingontheedge.org/offers.

For 30 years, Living on the Edge has helped Christians learn to live like Christians because of the faithful support of listeners like you. Every donation, whatever the size, helps keep this teaching on the air and reaching more people. Join us today by giving online at livingontheedge.org or call us at 888-333-6003. You can also mail your gift to Living on the Edge, PO Box 3007, Atlanta, Georgia 30304. Now, here’s Chip.

Chip Ingram: As you think about how big God is, I hope that as we were listening to this together, you thought to yourself, "He is big. He is powerful. He is all-knowing. He can change my life and my marriage. He can turn one of my kids around. He can change my attitude, my job. Wow, God could really change me."

Then maybe you thought, "So why isn't He?" It reminded me of an interview that I had on a talk show. This material that you're studying came out in a book. Usually, when a book comes out, you end up on a number of these live call-in radio programs and people call as you discuss the topic. We were on this very topic and a lady calls in and basically says, "You said in this book that God is bigger and He can handle all this stuff."

Then she spent a long time telling me about the marriage that wasn't working and the kid that wasn't working and the finances and her disappointment, her depression. She said basically, "If God is that big, how come He's not helping me? I've asked Him to." I remember asking her as gently as I could, "Ma'am, would you tell me a little bit about your own personal time in God's word?"

She goes, "I kind of read the Bible." I said, "Okay, do you spend some time praying?" She says, "Oh, man, I'm telling God about all this and asking Him for help." I'm thinking I'm kind of running out of possibilities. So then I said, "Excuse me, are you involved in a local church? And if so, is there really a close community of people that really love you that you're doing life together with?"

There was a long pause at the end. She goes, "No, I don't go to church. I did a couple times but I'm not close to anyone." Then I thought about the message of today. Life change happens for Christians in community. We learned today there are four attitudes and one practice where God changes us and at the core of it is relational authentic community.

As we close today, one question: are you in authentic community? Do you have close, deep, Christ-like relationships? If not, that will tell you why change isn't occurring like you want it to and like God wants it to. In the next broadcast, I'm going to help you learn how to get there if you're not there. So don't be discouraged. Join us next time as we learn how to break through the barriers that keep life change from happening.

Dave Druey: It’s a powerful lesson on knowing where the power to change actually comes from. So be sure to listen next time to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Today’s program is produced and sponsored by Living on the Edge.